Late Life Sex

Posted on by Paul Turek, MD

He was an elegant man in his late-80s and he came to see me for help. Widowed for 20 years, he recently met a younger woman; she was in her 70’s. He hadn’t had a sex life for many years and also noted “erection issues” for during that time.

Still Dreaming

“I would really like to have sex with my new lady friend, but I don’t think the system works anymore,” he stated.
“Sir, let me get this straight. You have lived a full and productive life, one that included fighting in wars, raising children, and living through several great depressions and 14 US Presidents. You have also loved and lost love and now you seek to love again. Getting your erection back really matters to you right now, doesn’t it?”
“Yes, very much, Doc.”
“Sir, you inspire me. Let’s get you that erection!”

Cocktail of Love

We devised a simple cocktail of medications to get his erections back and he called me back several weeks later, very excited:
“Doc, thank you so very much. Last weekend, I had the best sex of my life. I didn’t know it was still possible! I felt like I was 18 years old. And I’m going to see her again next weekend!”

Late Life Sex

I know what you’re thinking: How many octogenarians still have sex? Two recently published studies, one from the U.S. and the other from Britain surveyed over 10,000 mature adults, and suggest that it is more common than you might think:

  • 54% of British men and 31% of British women over age 70 still have sex.
  • 26% of US men aged 75-85 years still have sex. Slightly fewer women do.
  • 1/3 had “frequent sex” defined as at least twice per month.
  • The biggest sexual issue in older men is erectile dysfunction; in women, its low libido or sex drive.
  • Late lifers in poor health tended to be less sexually active than healthy octogenarians.

Maybe what Olivier Magny said really is true: “For at the end of the day, what matters is never the wine, it’s always the moment; it’s always the people.”